Weed used to be a friend of mine
Me and him we would mix just fine
Al, yeah, he used to be cool
Then I tried to hang with that dude in school
We used to be buds, we used to be tight
But that's too bad cuz tonight we fight!
[ MORTAL KOMBAT ]
Made me forget to take back my videos
Cuz you gave me a headache when I ate my cheerios
You beat your wife and neglect your kids
You don't even know what education is
All you do is bum cash from your mom
Sit around the house with the Xbox on
You're like a hurricane wrapped in a twister
Come home from the bar, tried to bang my sister
She made the first move, It's all in your head
I walked in the room, she was nude in my bed
But you wouldn't know, you were jammin tunes
I was watchin The Wiz with Dark Side of the Moon
You eat all the lunchmeat gettin the munchies
Your friends are like a pack of spider monkeys
You threw a party and destroyed the place
I tried to be nice and got punched in the face
You weren't even there, I have to say
That High Times shit was gay anyway
[ CHORUS ]
Alcohol vs Weed
Which do you prefer?
You burn holes in the seats of my GM
You make me drive everywhere after nine PM
I'm in the stores and you're illegal
Bring back prohibition and see how you feel
You buy your clothes from Aeropostale
Your shirts all wrinkled and your breath is stale
Your armpits stink like Jack and coke
You never get laid and you're always broke
You could find a job if you ever looked
I get unemployment and work off the books
I don't do shit and it feels just fine
I take my days one beer at a time
[ CHORUS ]
Alcohol vs Weed
Which do you prefer?
Hey guys, it's not that bad
You could be on heroin, it's totally rad
Feels so good you can't bear to stand
I sucked a dick for a dimebag man
I seen em!
You met my mom and you popped a boner
Lay off the herb you fuckin stoner
I come from the earth, don't be mad
Just cuz you got beat by your drunken dad
Your brain cells got drank
And yours got smoked, let's face it…
Your whole fuckin life's a joke